Monday, April 22, 2013

Living in the now

Anyone else think it's a big relief once you finally realize you can't control things? If it's not in your control, then you have permission to release a lot of that guilt and worry.

With that in mind, I see only two choices:

Stay angry at the past and wish it had all gone differently.


OR

Let it go, try better and be happy.

Which one will you choose?

Monday, April 15, 2013

My sparkle

I ran across this quote today and just love it:

Never let anybody else dull your sparkle!

That speaks volumes to me. I feel like I totally lost myself in my relationship with ex. There was so much about me that he didn't like or wanted to change, from the hue of my skin to my desire not to drink/party myself into oblivion like he did multiple times a week. For that, I was labeled a boring stick-in-the-mud. All for being myself.

By the time we separated a year ago, I barely saw any of the old me left.

Let me tell you, that has definitely changed. I'm much more confident and sure of what I will and won't put up with in my life. And while I have no idea what the future holds for my life as a mom and more, I try to remember that no one does.

No one has the answers. But we have ourselves. And don't let anyone make you think you're not worthy of being exactly who you are.

Never let anybody else dull your sparkle!

Friday, April 12, 2013

Checking in

Wow, it's been a long time since I posted.

I've just been at a point where I'm tired of talking about this divorce debacle all the time.

We should be coming close to the end soon (for now). We'll be going to limited case management soon to determine custody since we can't agree on it.

And he's trying to jack with my retirement.

All in all, a giant clusterf*ck.

But, one thing is for sure: This process has made me a much, much stronger person. I feel so much more like I know who I am, know what I want and am happy with myself.

On that note, have a great weekend!