Friday, May 24, 2013

The best revenge



So I just came across the above meme. It made me think of my situation (shocking, I know).

When ex and I first separated, and for many months after, I sometimes would make a point not to look too nice when I saw him at exchanges with the girls.

Why?

Well, I didn't want to look like I was thriving or happier or otherwise quickly moving on. There was a lot of guilt associated with the decision to divorce, and I didn't want to make him feel worse. So I'd do things like put on my new dress or nice makeup after I saw him.

Fast forward to now.

Ex seems to have it in his head that he's Mr. Winner in this whole divorce and that I (and my mom, who the girls and I live with) am struggling right now. He said he feels bad for me. Like I'm something to be pitied because I live with my mom and don't earn $1 million a year.

Oh, how wrong you are, sir.

The fact is, I am without things I would like at this age, like my own house, namely.

But I have gained so much in this divorce and learned more about how to make myself happy than I ever could have otherwise.

So now that meme rings true. Not only am I proud of how well I'm doing, I have no qualms anymore about showing it. My life is harder, but much happier on the whole.

I call that a success.

4 comments:

  1. Good for you...How are you? I am thrilled to see that you have gotten rid of some of the guilt..Keep your head up mama! My divorce is just about wrapped up, just dotting i's and crossing t's at this point..

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  2. Hey! I'm doing pretty well. We have our new schedule, testing for the next 6 months to see if ex can keep up his end of the bargain to a) not be an a-hole and b) cooperate as a parent. So glad to hear your divorce is almost final! Mine, too, I think. I have to figure out the financial logistics (I've seen the paperwork, but it makes no sense to me). Once I sign that and sign the mediation agreement, I assume all we have left is to have a judge sign off. Three cheers to having that painful experience in the past soon! :)

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  3. Cheers to that! I hope to pick up my blog soon. :)

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  4. Yes, I always enjoy reading about other single mothers' experiences!

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